Chickegg.wmf (9610 bytes)


Chickegg.wmf (9610 bytes)

Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why do chickens cross roads?
The most comprehensive listing on the Web (or so it should be).

L.A. Police Department:

Give me five minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Mark Lane:

There is new, irrefutable evidence that the chicken did not act alone.

Gary Larson:

Don't ask me. I am retired.

Stan Laurel:

I'm sorry, Ollie. It escaped when I opened the run.

Timothy Leary:

Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let it take.

John Le Carre:

Because it knew, at the core of its being where none could ever reach, that its only course of action now that its cover was blown wide open was to try and slip away into the grey, foggy, bleak evening before Smiley came, accompanied by his silent shadow Peter Guillam, asking questions for which there could never be answers.

Dr. Hannibal Lector:

So I could eat its liver, with some fava beans and a nice chianti .......thththththththth.


Are you sure it wasn't Zeus dressed up as a chicken? He's into that kind of thing, you know.

Foghorn Leghorn:

To get to that damn Dawg, Boah!

Princess Leia:

I don't know... but I have a bad feeling about this.
Chicken? I thought I recognized your fowl scent I was brought aboard!
The tighter your grasp, the more chickens will slip through your feathers!

Gottfried Von Leibniz:

In this best possible world, the road was made for it to cross.

Vladimir Lenin:

It is not the chicken's road. It is the PEOPLE'S road!

David Letterman:

And the No. 1 reason - fricasee!

Rush Limbaugh:

Beacuse of those damn bleeding heart liberals, trying to save one stupid bird while thousands of jobs are being lost.
It was having more fun than a chicken should be allowed to have!

Abraham Lincoln:

Fourscore and seven eggs ago, our forefeathers crossed this road.
We cannot dedicate - we cannot consecrate - we cannot hallow - this road. The brave chickens, living and dead, who crossed here have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract.

Dave Lister:

Because of the smegging space corps directives.

Logan (Law and Order):

To buy a plaid tie.

Jack London:

To answer the call of the wild.

H.P. Lovecraft:

To futilely attempt escape from the dark powers which even then pursued it, hungering after the stuff of its soul!

George Lucas:

Because the Force was with it.
You'll have to wait for the next set of movies, 1-3, to find out the real reason why the chicken crossed. The whole point of the current releases, 4-6, is the story of the chicken's redemption crossing.
I originally planned to have a chicken army attack the Stormtroopers on Endor, but the AT-AT walkers kept squishing them
The first chicken crossing scene was underbudget andrushed, so I've used ILM's digital editors to add several more cars and also a school bus, which has nothing to do with story, but I thought looked really cool. The sound effects have been bolstered by the folks at my THX studio, and now, for the first time, you can hear the chicken scream, even though chickens don't really scream, but the sound, I find, helps set the tone of the scene. The chicken itself has been recreated from old footage. We had to edit out the original road and replace it with an updated digital road. It looks nothing like the other roads in the film, but that's okay because I wanted to show the hustle and bustle of a real superhighway, full of the action and of the grand scale that the fans really deserve. The chicken's blaster effects have been improved; now you can clearly see that the Dodge shoots first, making the chicken look less like a cold-blooded killer. That the Dodge missed by about seven feet, even though they were only a lane apart, and that the Dodge had the draw and plenty of time to aim, merely demonstrates the chicken's skill. All in all, the scene is about ten minutes longer, which is still shorter than I originally envisioned, but I felt that adding any more might break the flow of the story. Now the fans can see the chicken cross the road the way it was meant to be seen, on the big screen.

Lwaxana (Star Trek):

Oh, Jean-Luc!
Oh, Odo!


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1998 Ervin Nemeth. All rights reserved.