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Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why do chickens cross roads?
The most comprehensive listing on the Web (or so it should be).

Salvador Dali:

The Fish.

Stephanie Daniels:

It was the turtle's day off.

Darwin:

	It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
	Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

Commander Data:

I do not know. Although I have compared all of my 437 billion data points relating to chickens and roads, there is no possitive correlation between the two.

The chicken, in observing that it was on the opposite side of the 20th century Terran paved roadway, was aware that its immediate goal should have been to traverse the distance without interception by an kind of combustion-propelled personal transport vehicle, but I am unclear as to why any kind of domesticated fowl should desire to perambulate upon a conveyance normally reserved for the usage of... yes, sir.

Dax (Star Trek):

	To get to the other side. Kurzon might have disagreed with me, Tobin I'm sure wouldn't have had a clue, and then there's...
	When you remember so many previous lives, it's so boring to stay on one side of the road all the time.

WFTL's Dante DeAngelis:

Now let me get this straight. You're saying a chicken crossed the road, and now YOU'RE asking ME, "WHY?"

Delenn (Babylon 5):

Valen asked the chicken, "Will you follow me into storm, into darkness, into fire, into death?" And the chicken said... "Yes."

W. Edwards Demming:

But is one chicken crossing one road of statistical importance? Only once we have established an historical baseline of chickens with respect to roads, with calculated upper and lower control limits, can we make that determination.

Arthur Dent:

Are you sure the chicken is from Beetelgeuse, and not from Gilford after all?

Jacques Derrida:

Any number of contending discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!

Rene Descartes:

	The chicken was merely a machine and was crossing due to the deterministic nature of the universe.
	It had sufficient reason to believe it was dreaming anyway.

Emily Dickinson:

Because it could not stop for death.

Bob Dole:

	Do you know that before that chicken had gotten across the road, its cellular phone was ringing and there was a lawyer on the other end asking if it would like to sue the city for not putting up a traffic light.
	Bob Dole says "To get to the other side."

Gul Dukat (Star Trek):

Well, that's a very interesting question...I'm sure we can work out some kind of arrangement to obtain that information that will be to everyone's satisfaction.

Bob Dylan:

How many roads must a chicken travel down, before they call him a man?