Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why do chickens cross roads?
The most comprehensive listing on the Web (or so it should be).
|It was the turtle's day off.
|It was the logical next step after
coming down from the trees.
|Chickens, over great periods of
time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically
dispositioned to cross roads.
|I do not know. Although I have
compared all of my 437 billion data points relating to chickens and roads, there is no
possitive correlation between the two.
|The chicken, in observing that it
was on the opposite side of the 20th century Terran paved roadway, was aware that its
immediate goal should have been to traverse the distance without interception by an kind
of combustion-propelled personal transport vehicle, but I am unclear as to why any kind of
domesticated fowl should desire to perambulate upon a conveyance normally reserved for the
usage of... yes, sir.
Dax (Star Trek):
|To get to the other side. Kurzon
might have disagreed with me, Tobin I'm sure wouldn't have had a clue, and then there's...
|When you remember so many previous
lives, it's so boring to stay on one side of the road all the time.
WFTL's Dante DeAngelis:
|Now let me get this straight.
You're saying a chicken crossed the road, and now YOU'RE asking ME, "WHY?"
Delenn (Babylon 5):
|Valen asked the chicken,
"Will you follow me into storm, into darkness, into fire, into death?" And the
chicken said... "Yes."
W. Edwards Demming:
|But is one chicken crossing one
road of statistical importance? Only once we have established an historical baseline of
chickens with respect to roads, with calculated upper and lower control limits, can we
make that determination.
|Are you sure the chicken is from
Beetelgeuse, and not from Gilford after all?
|Any number of contending
discourses may be discovered within the act of the chicken crossing the road, and each
interpretation is equally valid as the authorial intent can never be discerned, because
structuralism is DEAD, DAMMIT, DEAD!
|The chicken was merely a machine
and was crossing due to the deterministic nature of the universe.
|It had sufficient reason to
believe it was dreaming anyway.
|Because it could not stop for
|Do you know that before that
chicken had gotten across the road, its cellular phone was ringing and there was a lawyer
on the other end asking if it would like to sue the city for not putting up a traffic
|Bob Dole says "To get to the
Gul Dukat (Star Trek):
|Well, that's a very interesting
question...I'm sure we can work out some kind of arrangement to obtain that information
that will be to everyone's satisfaction.
|How many roads must a chicken
travel down, before they call him a man?
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© 1998 Ervin Nemeth.
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